What every couple must know is that marriage is far from the regular boyfriend-girlfriend relationship, in fact there is a vast difference. The moment you marry, it will never be the same as when you were dating, a lot of things change including sex. This is where the woman needs to be careful because these changes can cause the man to cheat and it’s not because he doesn’t love you, it’s because of some little things that women do that causes it.
Many women actually think, the moment you marry, that’s it, the battle has ended, in fact the battle has just begun and all the things you used to do that made him marry you must be doubled. You should be able to do twice what you used to do and not relaxed on your oars, because there is a lot of competition out there and it will surprise you to know, there a lot of women out there who prefer married men.
So if you do not want him to cheat, these are some of the things you need to look at to prevent him from cheating and they are also the main reasons why he will cheat if they are not well addressed.It is healthy to argue in relationships, in fact it strengthens it. Usually it is not the arguments that ruin relationships, it’s how it is done that ruins it. Your arguments should be debatable and not heated or fierce. If he is angry and he’s complaining about something, never interrupt because you feel your right is being abused, that wouldn’t solve it. Be mute and pay attention to the words and make notes (and when I say notes, it doesn’t mean you should grab a pen and paper), and then use it to buttress your point when he’s done with his points. Retorting all the time infuriates him and the more you do it, you know what happens? He confides in another women to find out if that’s how all other women behave and before you know, he warms up to her.
Make sure there’s always a solution at the end of the argument, he shouldn’t end it in anger and walk out or else he will find someone to soothe his anger.
There are many times men ended up cheating not because they wanted to but because they were forced to. Learn to make your arguments healthy to prevent him from seeking solace elsewhere.Many women in relationships before marriage are very adventurous and will do anything to make him happy but the moment a wedlock sets in, that ends it, everything runs out the window. Sometimes the man has to even beg for sex, it will surprise you to know that married men don’t get enough sex compared to unmarried men and 90% of men who never thought of cheating during courtship will have thoughts or wish to cheat in a year or two of their marriage, all because of lack of sex. It’s true, marriage comes with a lot of responsibilities but that shouldn’t take the bliss away. In fact, you need to frustrate him with sex and don’t make him ask for it at all. Men love it when they feel women can’t do without them in terms of sex and so when you pressure him with sex, you become like an idol to him. He thinks about you all the time anywhere he goes.
There’s also one thing you need to take note of, every man gets in the mood to have sex every 72 hours. These means that, right after emptying his balls, he has 3 days to fill it up again and so if you keep going for it, he wouldn’t even have the balls to look at another woman. But if you leave him to wallow in his ‘fullness’ for a month or if you decide you will let him have it monthly, then you’re asking for your doom. Because if a man don’t get it for a month, trust me he will start looking elsewhere and he wouldn’t mind approaching the first woman he sees on the street.
MAKE SEX ENTICING
Learn to put more spice in your love making, make it feel like it means everything to you and not like you giving in because he’s your husband or he wants it, not you, remember it takes two to tango.
One of the worst turnoff for men is to complain during sex. Complaining during sex such as, “My head is aching”, “it hurts down there”, “My feet hurts”, “it’s painful”, etc. puts men off. In every sex act, there would surely be some uncomfortable sex positions and so if you find yourself in such a position, it will be wise to suggest a different position or take charge of the situation than blurting out how you feel outright, the man usually feels you’re not interested and that you just doing it to satisfy him and not for both of you. When that happens, it will not feel like a husband and wife copulation to him, it will just be like him going for a prostitute because with that it’s just a service, no affection and love. If you really want to prevent him from cheating, let the sex be passionate and affectionate.
If you should find yourself in an uncomfortable position, it’s wise to suggest a different position smartly. Example, if you’re in the doggy position and you feel your knees are hurting, you don’t openly or bluntly say, “I’m tired” or “My knee hurts”, it puts him off and he start getting ideas. Don’t make him even notice it, just say, “Honey! I really want to ride you” or “Sweety, I really wish to cuddle and look at your lovely face, so come on top”, with this statements, you’ve suggested two different positions without him even knowing what’s really happening down there. But when you keep being blatant about it, he might feel you don’t want it and you doing it to just satisfy him.
You must also learn a lot of new things to spice up the sex, in fact you must always be ahead of the game. As a wife you must also think like a prostitute, there is no disrespect in this, thinking like a prostitute makes you more marketable to him and when you think like that, you know you’re rendering a service and getting paid for it. When he gets out there, he will not find none like you. Know his fantasies and use them, be ready to satisfy all his fantasies. No draw backs at all.
DON’T BE CONTROLLING
Often without realizing it, when we get into marriage we attempt to control the other person to do what works best for us. We engage in destructive relationship habits such as complaining, blaming, criticizing, nagging, threatening, punishing and bribing or rewarding to control.
When you do these things, you are sending a signal, there are better ones out there, he should try them and before you know it, he’s being consoled by another woman.
When a man gets to a peak he finds he’s not free, he will seek his freedom elsewhere and it will surprise you to know, women who date married men are so special to them than the wives because they know they are not theirs and can lose them at any time and so they do anything in their means to make them feel they are so special. All they trying to do is to keep their mind away from their competitor. You shouldn’t let that happen at all in the first place.
Unnecessary jealousy can make a man cheat outright. What men hate is when they being faithful and you telling them they are not, then they will be unfaithful just to be okay with the accusation.
Going through his phone, checking up on him, reading his messages, secretly spying on him are all not necessary. What you need to do are some of the points I mentioned earlier. If you’re not doing any of them, then there’s nothing you can do to prevent him from cheating. Men feel happy when their wives are accommodating and not the other way round.
You should let him feel comfortable when he’s always around, but if you let him feel insecure due to your jealousy, he will start staying out late.
Sometimes when women “get” the guy and get married, they begin to get a false sense of security. Remember, all relationships are voluntary. A person can leave at any time. With an over 50% divorce rate in this country, we need to remember how important it is to maintain a positive relationship, not simply to acquire one.
Making him feel appreciated is one thing that will keep him home always. Let him be your number one, such that when he’s out, he will be eager to always rush home to his wife.
GIVE HIM TIME AND SPACE
It’s true, he’s your husband, but not your slave and so learn to respect his space and also allow him to have some fun with his friends. Don’t camp him like your maidservant or else the moment he feels imprisoned, he will start seeking for ways to free himself and cheating is the best way out. And when I say, camp him, it’s not when you lock him up in a room only that means camping him. Calling every 5 minutes to know where he is, accusing him of going somewhere else when you know he went to work etc. are all part of camping him, he doesn’t necessarily have to be home to be camped.
Some men cheat because they begin to feel hemmed in by the relationship. Engaging in an affair can provide them the sense of freedom they lose in a relationship. Allow your man time for himself without you. Don’t try to monopolize all your guy’s time. Be open to time apart for him to spend with friends, pursue hobbies, etc. so he does not feel he has no freedom.
PRIORITIZE THE MARRIAGE
Often, when a man cheats, you will find the woman is also having an “affair” that’s not sexual. It’s more socially appropriate. This “affair” takes the form of prioritizing something, anything, over the relationship. This could be a job, children, a sick relative, a charity or anything that puts her man lower on her totem pole than the first position.