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YOUR EXPERIENCE CAN PATTERN THE WAY YOU THINK


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The 5 biggest breakfast myths

The first meal of the day can have a very different meaning for different people. For some, it’s grabbing a granola bar to nibble on during the morning commute; for others, it includes a big omelet with a cup of coffee at home.

Then there are the millions who forgo grub in the a.m. altogether.

But how do these morning behaviors really affect weight loss, energy levels and appetite throughout the day? In order to help you crack the breakfast code, we tracked down the latest research, in addition to insights from Katherine Zeratsky, a nutrition instructor at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota.

Before you do — or don’t — dig in, here’s a reality check on the biggest breakfast myths:

Myth 1: Breakfast is essential for weight loss.

Reality: Munching in the morning doesn’t have a direct effect on dropping pounds.

A recent study published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition found that when people are trying to lose weight, it doesn’t matter if they devour a dish first thing after waking up or if they skip it altogether.

The researchers assigned more than 300 overweight and obese (but otherwise healthy) individuals, ages 20 to 65, to either the control group (that continued with eating habits per usual), a group that was told to eat breakfast or a group that was instructed to miss the meal. After tracking their weight for 16 weeks, the scientists found that those who grabbed a bite in the morning didn’t lose any more weight than those who omitted a.m. snacks.

But take this finding with a grain of salt.

“Though our study suggests breakfast may not be key to weight loss, we only examined a general recommendation of eating versus skipping,” says Emily Dhurandhar, assistant professor at the Department of Health Behavior at the University of Alabama Birmingham and a lead author of the study. “Specific foods and timing may help,” so if weight loss is the goal, consult with a nutritionist or doctor to determine your best course of action.

Myth 2: Skip boxed cereals.

Reality: Sure, you should lay off the sweet stuff, but not necessarily the cereal itself.

Lucky Charms, Cocoa Puffs and Fruity Pebbles may taste delicious, but they aren’t packing a nutrient punch. That’s not to say that other cereals on the market can’t be a part of a healthy, balanced diet.

In fact, an Advances in Nutrition study found that whole-grain cereal can lower cholesterol (the soluble fiber prevents re-absorption of the substance in the gut). These slow-digesting carbs can also improve bowel function (the fiber content softens stool and promotes good-for-you bacteria in the digestive system), and help maintain a healthy weight.

The best choices when searching the shelves? Oat and barley mixes work best for those keeping an eye on cholesterol levels, and wheat bran is ideal for those with gut problems, says Peter Williams, honorary professorial fellow at the University of Wollongong in Australia and one of the study’s researchers.

Williams suggests portion sizes of about one-third to one-half cup of a heavy cereal, like muesli, or one cup of a light cereal, such as puffed grains.

Myth 3: You should eat a meal to fuel your a.m. workout.

Reality: Food will increase your energy; just consider your activity of choice.

As for whether a morning meal will help you power through a workout, the answer is most likely. Research from the University of Bath in the United Kingdom found that those who ate breakfast had higher energy expenditure in daily physical activity over a six-week period, compared to those who fasted until noon.

The study authors suspect that this effect can occur on any given day breakfast is eaten (discounting a long-term effect), because the improvement in energy levels was apparent from week one, says James Betts, research scientist and senior lecturer in the Department of Health at the University of Bath and lead author on the study.

Betts and his team also found high glucose levels in the breakfast-eating group, which signals to the brain and central nervous system that there’s energy available and motivates you to move.

“You may realize the quality of your physical performance that day is not critical, say if you’re performing simple housework, so you opt for skipping breakfast to take advantage of the negative energy balance,” explains Betts. “Or you may decide that you need breakfast to support your energy needs and perform to the best of your ability.”

Either way, breakfast can help support an active lifestyle.

Myth 4: Grabbing a bite before work will help you eat less later.

Reality: It’s not guaranteed to reduce calorie intake in the afternoon, but eating in the morning does release chemicals to the brain and can also steady glucose levels throughout the day.

A new study just released from the University of Missouri found that having breakfast, particularly dishes high in protein, increased young adults’ levels of dopamine (a brain chemical responsible for moderating impulses and reward), which may reduce food cravings and overeating later in the day.

Eating initiates a release of this neurohormone, which then triggers feelings of reward, explains Heather Leidy, an assistant professor of nutrition and exercise physiology at the University of Missouri and author of the study. That reward response, Leidy adds, is what helps people regulate how much they chow down.

If someone has eaten three meals in a given day and they’re still munching in the evening, that usually due to reasons other than hunger, like convenience, boredom, stress, or a reward, says Zeratsky. But that doesn’t necessarily mean eating breakfast will stave off late-night cravings. The above-mentioned University of Bath study found that having breakfast didn’t suppress caloric intake later in the day but that it did, however, regulate glucose levels in the afternoon and evening.

The benefits: “More variable glucose levels can indicate a poorer diet or a more unsteady metabolism,” says Betts. “And chronic inflammation from the body’s excess exposure to glucose can lead to issues like diabetes or cardiovascular disease.”

So while breakfast might not help you cut back on calories, it may cut disease risk.

Myth 5: Breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

Reality: It’s less about one meal than it is about what you eat over the course of the day.

According to the above recent research, weight loss isn’t necessarily tied to breakfast habits. It comes down to calories instead.

“It’s the total number [of calories] that matters, whether you divide that into two meals or six,” says Zeratsky.

But again, that doesn’t give you a free pass to skip breakfast every day. Having some foods to start out the day can promote a nutrient-rich diet overall, Zeratsky says.

Her go-to power meals: “energy foods,” including fruits and whole grains and “hunger-controlling” foods like milk, yogurt, or eggs. If you are working out in the early a.m., opt for something smaller (particularly if you have a sensitive stomach), such as a banana or whole-grain bread with peanut butter or honey. If you do choose to eat early in the day, be sure it’s something healthy that will do your body good.


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How to let go of things that don’t serve you

As I approach my 40th year in this life of mine, I find myself reflecting on past circumstances more than ever before. I have found, when I really dig deep, that I am still harboring negative thoughts that aren’t serving any good purpose in my life.

They say that you can find true peace when you allow yourself to let go of thoughts and feelings that are always in the back of your mind. But how do you do this?

It seems so hard, but actually, it doesn’t have to be. Here’s how:

Start by writing down things that bother you. It can be anything, big or small.
Then add things that make you feel guilty or shameful, even if they happened years ago.
Go ahead and include any negativity in your life that is out of your control. That should give you a good starting point to work from.
Add anything else you feel isn’t serving you in your life and then really dig deep into each item.
Sit with each of these feelings and truly allow yourself to let it go.

This may not happen overnight, but with time, you can allow yourself to be forgiven and to stop worrying about what you cannot change or events that are (or were) out of your control. We are all imperfect, but we are enough. Be sure to tell yourself that often.

We all have things that we push into the back of our minds on a daily basis. But, as I learned the hard way, if we don’t deal with them, at some point your body is going to backfire on you and make you address things immediately. This full-time stress and worry over things out of your control can really wreck your immune system and your overall happiness in life.

So I’ll start with examples of what isn’t serving me in my life and how I am working to let them go:

1. For the past four years, I’ve been carrying around a huge amount of guilt and anger associated with my mom’s death from breast cancer in 2009.

I find myself mad that I didn’t research alternative treatments or drugs when she was sick. I feel guilty that I listened to her doctor and let her eat sugar-filled food during chemo treatments, because I now know that cancer thrives on sugar. I feel guilty that there were a few times she was in pain and I had promised her that I would make sure she wasn’t ever in pain.

So how do I get past this? I have to let myself realize and know in my heart that none of it was my fault. I did the absolute best I could do given the terminal situation. I was completely alone in caring for her and had to leave my successful career for over a year to be with her each day. I have found peace and comfort knowing that I was lucky enough to spend every single day with her until she took her last breath.

I have to let go of the guilt about other treatment options. I didn’t know of them at the time and that’s not my fault. Allowing myself to get over these things has been a slow process, but one that I am making peace, and progress, with.

2. I must stop being concerned if other people don’t like me.

I am a people-pleaser by nature and very sensitive. If I know, or even feel, that someone is angry at me, it hurts me to the core. I now work to allow myself to let it go. If someone doesn’t like me, that’s their problem and their loss. I focus on myself and being the best person that I can be. Letting go of this concern has been so refreshing for me.

Often, we assume someone is upset with us when it really isn’t the case. So just being the best person that I can be on a daily basis is good enough for me. We don’t have time to wonder and ponder over someone else’s opinion of us when it really doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of life.

3. I am letting go of this idea that in order to be worthy, I have to do everything.

I have a full-time job and a growing health coaching business, in addition to being a mother and a wife. I rarely allow myself to relax and just “be.” My dad raised me to believe that relaxing is a sign of laziness. I now know this isn’t true. We all deserve some time off to enjoy life. I don’t have to constantly be doing something in order to be worthy. My idea of perfection also sets me up for failure every single time.

I am learning to let go of this idea that was put in my head at an early age. I am now allowing myself to relax without feeling guilty scheduling yoga into my day and taking time to just relax with my family.

What is it in your life that you are holding onto that isn’t serving you? What can you make a point to let go of and move forward in your life? I would love to hear them and wish you all the best in letting go of things that are not in your control so you can live a healthy, peaceful life.


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14 Differences Between the Girl you Date and the Woman you Marry

Black_CoupleThink about one of the questions below for a moment.

If you are married, in what way is the girl you dated different from the woman you married? If you are single or dating, in what way do you want the woman you marry to be different from the girl you are dating? What thoughts come to your mind? I bet you have a few thoughts, I also do.

After being married for over 3 years to my awesome wife, l can testify that the girl l dated is different from the woman l proudly call my wife. She has definitely improved in ways I never imagined, and for the better.

If you go through dating and your marriage journey, you will inevitable look back to realize the girl you dated is different from the woman are married to. To clarify, l do not mean she would become a brand new person. What l mean is that her priorities and perspective about life and marriage will improve in many ways. Hopefully, for the better.

Either way, the woman you marry will not be the same as the girl you dated.

1. The girl you date does not want to meet your family or friends, she wants you all to herself.
The woman you marry wants to know your family and friends. She knows without them, you would not be where you are, and who you are today.

2. The girl you date is overly worried about her nails been done all the time, her eyelashes looking in a certain style, and being beautiful for her peers. Her physical beauty is important to her.
The woman you marry is not overly worried about her nails being done. Instead, she is worried about being beautiful for her man, even if that means wearing no makeup. She focuses on her internal beauty and character building, because she knows real beauty comes from within.

3. The girl you date only cares about her career and her vision for life. She comes before the relationship, and does not make her future plans with you in mind.
The woman you marry cares about your career and your vision of life as well as her own. She knows you also have a plan, and works together with you to achieve the goals you both have. The marriage is her priority.

4. The girl you date loves the financial cushion you can provide.  She also expects something back whenever she gives.
The woman you marry wants to build a financial cushion with you. She believes that two heads will always be better than one. When she gives, she does not expect anything back.

5. The girl you date believes she knows everything.
The woman you marry is open to learning something new, and knows there is always room for improvement.

6. The girl you date is scared to tell you her deepest secrets.
The woman you marry will share her deepest secrets with you, even if it means losing you. She trusts you, and shares everything with you. She knows honesty is always the best policy.

7. The girl you date does not get excited about marriage and children (even if she wants to have some one day).
The woman you marry gets excited about marriage and starting a family with you.

8. The girl you date shows her cleavage all the time.
The woman you marry is more modest because she knows her attributes are for your eyes only.

9. The girl you date is not concerned about cooking for you.
The woman you marry loves not only to cook, but chooses delicious and healthy meals. The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach after all, right?

10. The girl you date is overly concerned about how long you will be around, and how she can keep you.
The woman you marry is not too concerned about keeping you because she knows you want to have a future with her. She is mature enough to know you can never force someone to stay and that you each have to choose each other every day, again and again.

11. The girl you date is not willing to compromise with you.
The woman you marry is willing to compromise, and sees compromise as a necessity for a healthy marriage

12. The girl you date thrives on constant attention from you.
The woman you marry mirrors your affection and thrives on providing you with the love, support, and respect you need.

13. The girl you date tries to change who you are and compares you to her ex.
The woman you marry accepts you for who you are and will not compare you to her ex. She knows you are the best and that you cannot change another person no matter how hard you try.

14. The girl you date has to be entertained.
The woman you marry is someone you can have fun with, relax, do activities, or do nothing together and still enjoy each other’s company.

What are your thoughts on these differences between the girl you date and the woman you marry?

Some of these differences can also apply to the boy you date and the man you marry


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Must Read: What Is Love In The Computer Age?

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What is love when we’re all online, living out our relationships in front of everyone, from crushes to exes, to rivals? What happens when it all goes wrong – has the networked society made lovesickness milder, or bitterer than ever?

“We’ll always be together/ Together in electric dreams.” Giorgio Moroder.

The other day my mate told me about “deep liking” on Instagram. I’d never heard of it, but apparently it’s popular with young Casanovas everywhere. The idea is that if you fancy someone on Instagram you scroll down to their very first picture and like it, and maybe leave a saucy comment too. It’s really creepy, isn’t it? But supposedly it shows a level of commitment in taking the time to scroll through thousands of other snaps, and although it’s not really up there with crawling over broken glass or launching a thousand ships, in these days of instant gratification it’s better than nothing.

Love is voracious now: we’re connected to everyone around the world, we want lots of crushes and we’re happy to choose them on the most superficial level of flattering selfies and warm filters. Today if you fancy someone you can study their selfies, poke them, or sext them all from the comfort of your own bedroom; although, as this summer’s Jennifer Lawrence naked pictures scandal has shown us, sexting, or even just having sext-y pictures on your phone is very risky. In the past people lived their private lives in private so far as possible, though of course there were always gossips and whispers. And while there was always a fascination with the lives of the powerful, rich and famous, in the old days they were far better able to control the printing houses and scurrilous rumourmongers than they are today. In Britain it was the 60s, specifically the Profumo Affair of 1961, which really started our ever-spiralling culture of scandal. It began with a brief affair between John Profumo, a married man as well as Secretary of State for War in the Conservative government, and Christine Keeler, a 19-year-old would-be model and exotic dancer in Soho, and quickly escalated into an intoxicating thriller involving sinister society osteopaths and Russian spies, knife fights in nightclubs and a Caribbean drug dealer firing shots at a Marylebone mews house. Once the story eventually broke it sold millions of papers and contributed to the downfall of the Conservatives in the 1964 general election.

“56% of young adults in the UK now break up with each other through texts or online messages and often explain that technology makes the process “less awkward”.
Since then our idea of privacy has slowly wilted away; we want to disgrace our politicians, and they in turn want to run sprawling surveillance operations on the whole world. More than that though, celebrity sex scandals and fashion faux-pas have become our favourite form of entertainment, which are themselves signs that no-one cares two hoots about privacy and nothing much is sacred.

Nowadays we live in public like never before, in these times of narcissism, obscenity and cowardice, writing our own intimate diaries online for all to see. Everyone’s constantly promoting themselves and flirting with each other, because the internet is tailor-made for self-love, desire and fantasy.

Consider the Pirates of the Ibiza Modelising Circuit, on Cipriani’s Shores. Justin Bieber and Miranda Kerr’s entanglement appears to have begun at the 2012 Victoria’s Secret catwalk show, when they – her in a hardly-there bejewelled green corset, and him in a camp and unflattering space-gilet from the future – flirted together for the cameras. At the time the fashion world was awash with rumours that they’d got it on, but really who knows? Then this summer, in a fight over her honour, a vengeful Orlando Bloom allegedly “vaulted” a high-end sofa and attempted to wallop the Canadian pop-star.  Afterwards the ever-unapologetic Bieber took to Instagram in an uncool and un-gentlemanly manner, uploading first a photo of a bikini-clad Kerr – quickly deleted – and secondly a picture of Bloom crying, captioned with a cheeky crown emoji.

The point though is that there’s an etiquette to social media and Justin Bieber has disregarded it. Firstly: never brag after a break-up, because bad things will happen to you. Secondly: don’t masquerade around like a peacock.

All those internet relics of broken relationships become an extension of yourself, and hanging onto them is a way of hanging onto the past and prolonging your pain, and yet somehow these bad feelings are so important.
The internet is also dramatically changing the way we find a lover. According to dating site eHarmony’s romantic soothsayers, by 2031 around 50% of all new relationships in the UK will have started online: 38% through an online dating or matchmaking service, and a further 12% through other sites (such as Instagram or Facebook). The worry is whether we will even have the social skills to meet people in the real world in the future, or whether we will have to rely on technology entirely? Already a lot of young men in London are awful at approaching young women – too shy, too terrified of rejection – and staying in and trying out apps certainly won’t sharpen their real world seduction skills. Of course it might raise their confidence, but I wonder if boys who turn to apps are looking for love in all the wrong places?

It can actually be very lonely for a young man on Tinder. You like all the girls and none of them ever like you back; and yet, when you look at girls’ phones they have hundreds of matches and hot messages from all of them. One hoax account that three bored college students forged in Orem, Utah – for an imaginary froyo-loving 21-year-old called Sammy, who they conjured up through photos of Miss Teen USA – recently convinced 70 men to turn up at the same branch of Yoghurtland at 9pm.

What if though, rather than using our computers to find other lovers, we actually turned our computers into lovers? That’s the premise of Spike Jonze’s sci-fi rom-com Her, set in the not-too-distant future, in which a lonely gentleman starts dating his operating system. The story was inspired by “this very limited interaction with a programme, an instant messaging chat,” Spike explained in an interview with the Telegraph. “Then Siri came out as I was writing this. It seemed like a good sign.” The more our phones talk to us, the more opportunities there are to flirt with them; and with the rise of affordable virtual technology for our houses, such as the Oculus Rift headset, imaginary girlfriends and boyfriends are likely to become more and more compelling.

Most young adults in the UK now break up with each other through texts or online messages (around 56%) and often explain that technology makes the process “less awkward”. It certainly allows you to stay cold and detached, but really it can make everything so much more awkward. Most likely we’ve all experienced those sleepless twilights – having bad dreams, breaking into tears while listening to Rihanna and so on – but sometimes it’s way, way worse. Social networks can become like a big black cloud of lost lovers, that follows you around everywhere and reminds you of what you’ve lost.

Studies have shown that if you’re always lurking on your ex-girlfriend’s or boyfriend’s page after a break-up you’ll have a harder time moving on.

It’s no surprise that social networks have a hold over our emotions, our cognitive processes and even our imaginations. This July a report entitled Experimental Evidence of Massive-Scale Emotional Contagion through Social Networks revealed that, for one week in 2012, Facebook performed a grand study on 689,003 of its users without telling them, in order to test whether controlling what appeared on their news feeds could control their emotions. Of course it could. The report concludes:

“These results indicate that emotions expressed by others on Facebook influence our own emotions, constituting experimental evidence for massive-scale contagion via social networks… We also observed a withdrawal effect: people who were exposed to fewer emotional posts in their news feeds were less expressive overall on the following days.”

After all, if you’re always staring into your phone, how will you know if the love of your life walks by?
So it makes us : ) and it makes us :’(. Social media captures all of reality like butterflies in a jar, both the good and the bad, and why not? Society is not all happiness, nor is life, not at all. Most of the best songs ever written are devastatingly sad, as are a lot of the best films and books. Today we place ourselves and our friends at the heart of our daily entertainment, we turn our lives into ridiculous soap-opera storylines, and why shouldn’t it make us miserable?

Having your crushes, exes and unrequited loves all over your social networks certainly isn’t good for your paranoia, but it’s far better to stay connected than to drift away forever. “What is love?” howls Haddaway. “Baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more!” But perhaps this hurt is love. Actually, isn’t that what he was singing about all along? All those internet relics of broken relationships become an extension of yourself, and hanging onto them is a way of hanging onto the past and prolonging your pain, and yet somehow these bad feelings are so important. Consider the comic Louis CK’s thoughts on love, as expressed (to him) by a doctor in his sitcom:

“You know, I’m not entirely sure what your name is, but you are a classic idiot. You think spending time with her, kissing her, having fun with her, you think that’s what it was all about?… This is love. Missing her, because she’s gone. Wanting to die. You’re so lucky. You’re like a walking poem. Would you rather be some kind of a fantasy? Some kind of a Disney ride? Is that what you want? Don’t you see? This is the good part. This is what you’ve been digging for all this time. Now you finally have it in your hand, this sweet nugget of love, sweet, sad love, and you want to throw it away. You’ve got it all wrong.”

So there. Actually, our sudden proximity to everyone from our past and our future is the most important thing about love in the computer age. We live in a great age of opportunity, and love is always only just around the corner, and all your social networks are full to the brim of fascinating strangers, if you care about that sort of thing. And if you don’t, why not stop wasting all your time on the internet of infinite sadness and just go out in the world and make hay while the sun shines. After all, if you’re always staring into your phone, how will you know if the love of your life walks by?


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So Cute And So Incredibly Awkward. You’ve Got To See These Embarrassing Baby Pictures.

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Being a baby is full of humiliation. You can’t talk, you can’t walk, and you can’t go to the bathroom anywhere but your own underpants. If that wasn’t bad enough, your parents seemingly go out of their way to make you look ridiculous. (Seriously, bonnets? Naked photos?) It’s like they’re worried their bald, chubby, child’s coolness level might overshadow their own.

It’s insane and there’s nothing you, as a baby, can do about it. I’ll bet these little ones wish they could though, and with good reason!


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Ladies! Your “Brazilian Hair” Weave-on may Actually be Goat Hair….Find Out

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Hey Ladies. This one is for you!

We know how much you love that human hair. From the Brazilian, to the Argentine, and Peruvian, and everything in between.

But did you know that a lot of this so called premium hair is actually mixed with goat hair? Other times, the “Brazilian” hair is actually Chinese hair.

According to BBC, because of the increased costs of obtaining high-quality human hair, manufacturers in China have resorted to buying moderate quantities of real hair (which is often Chinese hair), and then mixing it with goat hair to save costs and to increase the volume of supply.

Goat Brazilian Hair

Lily,  a Chinese woman manufactures and sells wigs and other extensions was one of the people who made this revelation to BBC.

“We say it is Indian hair or Brazilian hair, but in fact it is normally Chinese hair or even goat hair. They never realise. This is the only way we can keep things cheap,” she said.

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She also stated that most of her customers are Africans.

“We used to sell to Europe and America, but now nearly 100% of my clients are in Africa,” she said.

The Africans are reportedly mostly Nigerians, Ghanaians, Congolese, South Africans, Angolans and Ugandans.

One of Lily’s customers shared her thoughts on why she purchases the hair, even though she knows it isn’t totally authentic.

She said:

“Of course I know the hair is not real. The Chinese think we’re stupid. I come all the way from Uganda and they think I don’t know hair

I laugh a lot when I go home and I know that the beautiful women of Kampala have goats on their heads.”


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Meet 9 year old CEO, Cory, who lives the life of a King [PHOTOS]

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He’s the founder and CEO of Mr. Cory’s Cookies, his own booming cookie business that he started in an effort to help his mom buy a car after moving from NYC to New Jersey in 2009.

But what sets the curly-haired entrepreneur apart from the competition is his GQ-approved sense of style. Most people thinks his mum styles him but no, he styles himself. When asked by strangers if she dresses her son, Cory’s mom usually replies, “Do you see what I have on? I need my son to dress me.”

See more photo of him below


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Dangers of Indecent Dressing for our Young Ladies

Piety and reverence is typically synonymous with modesty. But today, caution seems to have been thrown to the wind as indecent dressing, even in places of worship, has become a trend.

Clergies are beginning to express fears over the spate of indecent dressing in churches, especially by ladies. This phenomenon, that was once alien to Africa, is gradually becoming a norm and is contributing to the increase in the rate of immorality and other ills plaguing the society.

The ugly act has taken a dangerous dimension in the society with young ladies often found in attires that reveal their body anatomy inside out. To many, the dressing pattern is suggestive of something. More embarrassing is the fact those dresses are largely transparent.

|| “Our pride as women lies in hidden and protected treasure; but when a girl exposes it to the public, it reduces her worth in the sight of everyone in society and it makes the man to lose respect in her, there won’t be anything left for the man to explore. Any man that will come after her will only be doing so out of lust, and just to devour what she has displaced for him.”

Because of this, in 2008, the then chairman, Senate Committee on Women and Youth, Senator Eme Ufot Ekaete, presented a bill on indecent dressing on the floor of the senate titled, “An Act to Prohibit and Punish Public Nudity, Sexual Intimidation, and Related Offences”. The bill proposed a jail term of six months for offenders. But humanitarian organisations condemned the bill.

Reacting to the said bill, Anita Kyaagba, an undergraduate stated: “We are living in a free world and so, we are free to wear anything we want. Besides, since you don’t buy the clothes for me, who are you to tell me what to wear? I wear what makes me comfortable. As a young girl, I follow fashion trend, I wear the best in vogue and if it accentuate some parts of my body, and my boyfriend likes it, I don’t see anything wrong in it”.

Adefunke Olutoye, another student who spoke to LEADERSHIP stated that she had to stop attending a church in which she grew up because the ushers stopped her from entering inside one Sunday because of what she was wearing. According to her, “I wore a mini gown which highlighted my hips and boobs and the ‘old-fashioned’ usher refused to allow me enter the church. Since then I decided to join another church that won’t judge me based on my dressing, but my heart. Besides, the Lord sees the heart, not the body, so, why should anybody judge me”?

On her part, a retired school principal and mother of five, Mrs Hilda Kumbin stated that:
“It is unfortunate that standard has fallen in the society and parents are not helping because they don’t have time for their children. There are many reasons why young girls come out in indecent dresses but the most important I think has to do with self-esteem. When a young girl feels inadequate, lacking in self-confidence, she will do anything to draw attention to herself and wearing indecent clothes could be her way of doing that. They forget that for every action, there is a reaction and that is why we have series of cases like raape.

“Most young women have fallen victims to rape because of the provocative dresses they put on. I believe that, indecent dressing debases womanhood because it tends to expose parts of the woman’s body that forms her treasure. Our pride as women lies in hidden and protected treasure; but when a girl exposes it to the public, it reduces her worth in the sight of everyone in society and it makes the man to lose respect in her, there won’t be anything left for the man to explore. Any man that will come after her will only be doing so out of lust, and just to devour what she has displaced for him. Even if you are decent but decide to wear indecent clothes, people will insult you”, she said.

Continuing further, she said, “A girl’s behaviour is often influenced by the type of training and grooming she gets. It has become necessary to establish guidelines for parents and students on acceptable mode of dressing. The National Assembly must enact a law that will regulate dressing in the society. I like what some schools like University of Abuja and Nasarawa State University, Keffi are doing on indecent dressing. Government must ban unscrupulous music videos and films, while parents must discourage their children from such dressings. In the same vein, teachers must discourage this madness. Young people must know that indecent dressing do not improve their beauty, rather, they dent their image and it also symbolises rebellion and immorality, ending in molestation”, she cautions.

Also, Mr Peter Abbass, a Psychology lecturer in Nasarawa State Polytechnic stated: “I think it‘s time a course on immorality or indecent dressing is introduced in schools. I think it is low self-esteem that is making young girls to dress indecently. It makes them believe that they have to do something, sometimes improper to be noticed, this is to fill an emptiness in their lives. They are not contented with their abilities and beauty.

“These young girls see other ladies dressing that way and because men chase after such girls, the girl with very low self-esteem will want to join them to get the same attention. One thing about indecent dressing is that it attracts attention; whether it is a negative or positive one, the bottom line is that it attracts attention. People must stare and automatically, such a person is noticed. So, when a girl who feels insecure wants to be noticed, she resorts to indecent dressing.

“Indecent dressing portrays our society and institution as immoral, if it’s in the church, it portrays the pastor as weak and not spiritually sound. Parents and adults must dress well and honourably as an example for younger generations. The mass media should promote good moral values and religious leaders must strongly preach against indecent dressing because you will be addressed by the way you are dress,” he said.

For Pastor John Ishaku, Christian parents must teach their children how to dress decently because that is what the Bible says. “In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with braided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becomes women professing godliness) with good works.” So it is a command from the Bible. It is a sin for a lady dressing half naked to walk in the street or come to church”.

Mallam Yahaya Abdulaziz, a Muslim cleric also stated that, “No good Muslim woman will dress indecently because it is clearly written ‘Tell the believing men that they shall subdue their eyes (and not stare at the women), and to maintain their chastity. This is purer for them. God is fully cognizant of everything they do’.”

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Stop Adding These Useless Things to your Résumé or CV

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Curriculum Vitae vs Resume – Are there Differences?

Even though the terms ‘Curriculum Vitae’ and ‘resume’ are generally interchangeable, few people know that they do differ in many ways. It is true that both are lists of the most relevant information of a person pertaining to job seeking. Both are used for the same purpose – i.e. seeking employment.

However, there are a few basic differences, i.e. while the Curriculum Vitae represents an in-depth and structured information about the professional experience and qualification of a person, the resume usually is the same thing in a very short form – hence, the name. The resume would usually represent a skeletal representation of what would otherwise be included in depth and detail in the Curriculum Vitae. This is why typically a CV would be two to three pages while the resume would not normally exceed one page.

The Curriculum Vitae is the most accepted form for job applications all over the world. You would find some basic variations in the order of presentation from country to country and sometimes from company to company. However, in terms of content, it basically remains the same.

The resume, on the other hand is the most accepted form for job applications in USA. Here, the Curriculum Vitae would be used exclusively for jobs in academics. A detailed Curriculum Vitae would also be demanded when you apply for government grants.

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Curriculum Vitae (CV)

The main features of the CV are outlined in brief below:

  1. The Curriculum Vitae is a list of all your achievements until the date you are submitting it, presented in reverse chronological order (i.e. the latest achievements first)
  2. The Curriculum Vitae is ideally two pages in length, though it can sometimes go up to three to five pages
  3. The Curriculum Vitae would include everything that you have done and can be classified as work outside the home – whether paid or unpaid; hence, it is okay if the Curriculum Vitae contains voluntary and honorary positions and work done in such positions
  4. The Curriculum Vitae structure is very systematic and is generally drawn in a specific order
  5. The Curriculum Vitae is normally accompanied by a cover letter, which summarizes what it contains and points out the match of the applicant with the job
  6. A Curriculum Vitae can be written in the following three styles: functional CV, targeted CV and performance CV

 Resume

The main features of the Resume are as under:

  1. A resume is a precise and very brief document representing at-a-glance your key skills and main achievements
  2. A resume should not be longer than one page, unless in rare exceptions
  3. A resume would contain of only what is strictly relevant to the job applied and nothing else – it is more important here to have all the information contained within one page, that representing the information it in totality
  4. The resume would highlight your skills and achievements above all other things
  5. The resume is usually presented without a cover letter because the main reason you are submitting the resume, is fast processing; a cover letter would defeat the purpose
  6. A resume usually can be written in three very different styles – (i) Chronological resume – whereby your skills and main achievements are listed by date starting with the most recent ones first, (ii) Functional resume – whereby your skills and experience are more highlighted than anything else and (iii) a combination of both – whereby both skill and achievements are presented hand-in-hand.

Curriculum vitae and Resume – So Similar Yet Different!

As mentioned above, the CV is mostly used throughout the world, while the US companies are more comfortable with resumes; this is mostly because it is faster and easier to scan through the one-page resume than a Curriculum Vitae and it forces the applicant to be very specific.

Useful Link: Latest Jobs in Ghana

Read more on this at: http://articles.jobhouse.org/curriculum-vitae-vs-resume-are-there-differences/#ixzz3H1V8Ta3w


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Men: These Are 6 Benefits You Get When You Date Plus Size Women (Obolo)

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In our era, it seems slim women are glorified due to how the media paints them, but as the Akan adage goes, “Mmere Akanfoo behu s3, onanka nam y3 d3 no, na seremfuoo awi awie” to wit “By the time Akans will know how delicious a snake’s meat taste, Northerners would have finished eating it by then”. What this simply means is that, if you’ve never dated a plus size woman, then you don’t know what you missing. This ideology of being slim is the ‘ish’ is created by our popular fashion magazines making many women going for the slim pill. At least, there must be some flesh on it.

Many men are opting for slim women due to the image the media paints all the time, but men who date plus size women are saying, you’re missing out on something big and here are the 6 benefits you get when you date plus size women.

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1. Never Go Hungry

Women with more to love have a great passion for food. They like talking about it, cooking it, baking it, frying it, eating it or dining out for it. All foodie lovers come in different shapes and sizes but some men love taking a woman out and knowing his woman will order exactly what she wants and will finish her food. Not wasting money or food! Eight times out of ten, a bigger woman knows where and how to get the food.

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2. Less Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

Apparently, BBW’s can be less superficial and not all about her looks/figure. They seem to not rely on their outer appearance as much in comparison to “gym bunnies”. Big beautiful girls may escape through books, writing, and hobbies. They are not afraid to laugh out loud or be funny. Many men find a BBW relies on her wit, personality, and character to keep you interested outside the bedroom.

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3. Bow Chica Wow Wow In The Bedroom

Some men say chubby ladies are even better in bed! Men like the feeling of holding a voluptuous woman in their arms rather than skin and bones. They can serve up everything you want better than KFC, from breasts to thighs. Plus, apparently some men have said “big women are cuddlier than their skinnier counterparts; they will keep you warm and cozy… again saving money!

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4. No Inferiority Complex

If your girlfriend is so fit and in shape, there is a constant pressure on you to maintain yourself. Do you realise that you would be living under constant pressure to keep up with her? It is so much better to be with a fat girl who will wake up late with you on Saturdays and share a big bite of leftover pizza with you.

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5. Dangerous Curves Ahead!

Up to the 1900s, thick women were the pin ups and objects of sexual desire because nature dictated that the fuller the female’s figure, the more fertile she was; and more likely to nurture and keep the off-springs alive. There might be the pressures of today’s social norm to be thin and synonymous with attractive; however, men cannot keep away from curves because it is in their nature! Embrace it brothers!

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6. Total Workout

Dating big girls will require men to workout and strengthen their bodies to handle their business in the bedroom. Guys that can handle a big woman are usually very strong. MEN: How does FREE weight training sound?!